Sparkling Vampire Refuses to Shag Dog for New Film

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Seriously, we Shih Tzu not.

[dropcap size=small]T[/dropcap]he director was definitely barking up the wrong tree when he asked Twilight star Robert Pattinson to give a dog a hand job for his latest film Good Time. The film, which follows Robert Pattinson as a New York criminal fighting to save his little brother over the course of one night, received a standing ovation at the Cannes Film Festival in May. Personally, a film where a dog gets a handjob sounds absolutely pawful but it received a six-minute round of appaws so we could be wrong.

According to Robert Pattinson, his character, Corey, has a close relationship with dogs because he believes in a previous life that he was one.

“He thinks he has control over animals and stuff. There’s this one scene we shot where basically a drug dealer bursts in to the room and I was sleeping with the dog and basically giving the dog a hand job.”

However, when Robert Pattinson refused to perform the sex act for real believing it would be a Mastiff mistake the director responded by saying, “just do it for real man, don’t be a p*ssy.” The actor claimed a dog trainer said he should “massage the inside of his (the dog’s) thighs.” This all sounds like a ruff scene to watch and fortunately for the dog a fake dog penis was made for the scene and was eventually cut from the film entirely.

Oddly enough, Robert Pattinson claims “It was fun … it will be on the DVD extras.” Just howl that is fun is beyond us and we’re sure you’ll be scarred fur-ever if you watch it.

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Rob
Rob
In the beginning the Universe was created. This has made a lot of people very angry and is widely regarded as a bad move.

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